I was at the Vancouver Fundraising Day conference last week, catching up with clients, candidates, and former colleagues. We swapped stories about old projects, shared updates on mutual friends, and laughed about memories from past workplaces. I found myself reminiscing with former colleagues and thought, "Wow, I sound really old!" All these memories, all this nostalgia, it was heartwarming, but it also got me thinking.
It reminded me of my early career days, sitting in conference sessions and listening to veteran fundraisers tell stories about their experiences, projects they had worked on, campaigns they had led, and challenges they had overcome. At the time, it was inspiring and sounded impressive.
But often, these stories included subtle name-dropping, mentions of prominent donors they had worked with, sometimes in passing, sometimes to underline their credibility. That’s when I realized there is a fine line between sharing your experience and using other people’s names to make yourself look good.
So when is name-dropping okay, and when does it get cringe?
In interviews or pitches, it can be risky. Donor relationships, much like candidate-recruiter relationships, are highly confidential. Talking about which donation you managed for which donor can quickly become a problem. Even if the gift was not anonymous, the donor might not be comfortable with it being discussed.
I do not think it is inherently bad to mention a gift you helped secure when it is publicly named after a donor. But rattling off how you know this donor, that donor, their kids, their dogs, and so on, can raise red flags. Your audience, whether an interview panel or a potential funder, might wonder how seriously you take confidentiality, or worse, if you are just bragging.
There is a distinction we need to make. Talking about mutual friends and colleagues in a nostalgic, friendly way is natural. Using people’s names strategically in a pitch or interview to boost yourself? That is a different story, and that is where it gets cringe.
Of course, we are all human and may have been guilty of it ourselves. The important thing is to keep it authentic and relevant, and let your experience speak for itself. Nostalgia and stories are great, but boasting about connections is not.